Hey You All!!

You all have to go to the Morningstar website and order this book. Check it out.

The Extraordinary Journey by Matt Peterson. OMG God knows what I need, right when I need it. He is the pastor at Morningstar Winston Salem. And down load their podcast too! GOOD STUFF!

Birdie

The Lord Knows My Heart.....

That's all I need to know, and peace is starting to settle in me. Thank-you Lord

The Lord Gave My Voice Back

I am singing again. It felt really good. The Lord lifted things off of me, and I can sing again. It feels good. Thank-you Lord!

Thankful but Seeking

I thankful that the Lord gave me a spirit of a Berean. I am thankful that I am not content with status quo. I am thankful that I am not afraid to speak up, and I am thankful that the Lord will give me Wisdom! haha (sick of foot in mouth syndrome) I am thankful that the Lord has given me the burning desire to have truth and reality in the deepest parts of my being. I am thankful that I want you Lord. I am thankful that you are returning for me. Thank-you Lord!!

When I Goto IHOP

I am asking the Lord for something huge, and I am going with great expectation. I am serious when I say this. I am asking for a brain transplant. Yes, I did say that! I am asking the Lord to help me with my studies, and I asking that the Lord would supernaturally download the Greek, Hebrew, and Aramaic. And all things Biological and Chemical. Just a little prayer to the Lord. I would be a fool not to ask Him.

Later!!
Birdie

THJ #3

Even though it's hard, I am thankful that I am going to make it to the other side...Yay Lord!

To My Loyal Three Followers......

Spread the Word. I will be in the research stage of how to make a podcast. I will also have a blog to follow that podcast. Here is the link, check it out! I am totally inspired and can't wait to see what happens with my new social experiment. :)

Love you all,
Wendy

http://freethearpy.blogspot.com/

FYI

Today I made the decision to go to IHOP once I get back home from Morningstar. I figure why not? I will get my traveling done before I go back to School! wooo-hoo!

THJ #2

I am thankful that the Lord leads me to all truth!!

THJ Post # 1

Lord, I am thankful that I have a good God that is willing to fix my attitude problem. Amen!

Thankful Heart Journal

By inspiration of Mark a brother at Living Light, He shared how He kept a Thanksgiving journal. He and his wife write in it every day. So I thought, I might just write my thanksgiving here on my blog! So, with that said. I think a little gratitude will change my attitude. :) hahah!!! It's true!!! So with that said on to the next journal entery.

Since I Have Been Tardy....

Yes, it has been an intense season, and I totally slacked on my blog. Here are some things that are coming into play. New Years, down to Morningstar I go! YAY GOD! After these last 4 months, this is such a welcomed vaccation. I am going to Meet with God and Rock out with John Mark McMillian and bring in the New Years with some of my favorite people in the world. What the Crap!!! This is awesome! I am like totally jumping out of my skin! I can't wait! Well, that's part of my problem.

I am expecting God to move, refresh me, and give me direction for the next season of my life, while I am down south. I just want God! I want the reality and I am done playing Church! I am going with an expectant heart, and knowing I won't be disappointed!!!!

This is the plan, I am going to journal and blog while I am down there at Morningstar. I think its going to be an awesome time for encounter with the One and True Living God. I pray that the Lord will answer the questions that have been lingering in my heart. And I am also praying the divine appointments that were sent before the foundations of the earth, will be met with a sense of Holy Fear of the Lord and excitement with building new relationships.

So, There. Forgive my tardiness. It's going to flow.

Peace, Love, and all that Good Stuff from Heaven above

Wendy

I Didn't Forget My Avid Readers

Life is calming down a little bit. I start my English Composition Class tonight. I am sure I will have plenty to share in the weeks to come. I love you all.

Birdie

Starlog aug0409

I really don't know where to start writing today. I am just flustered with this situation. I know that the Lord has been dropping nuggets of wisdom into my spirit man, but man this is really hard.
I think nothing can prepare you for dealing with someone who has schizophrenia. I didn't realize how hard it's been. Since my mom has been back in town I have dropped 10 pounds. It's not the greatest weight loss plan if you ask me. Well, I have to say it's better than fasting. Love ya Jesus!

To ask for help, the Lord has been showing me that it takes a level of humility, and a level of brokenness. To cry out for help, your realize your ways of doing things is not working and you are desperate to see something change. To cry out for help, is facing the fact is that I screwed up and I can't get myself out of this situation!!! LORD JESUS!!!! HELP!!! I DON'T LIKE THIS!! HELP ME! Lord I am sorry for trying to do things my way. I honestly think that there is two honest prayers before the Lord, HELP and I LOVE YOU JESUS!! I think all the other forms of prayer is legitimate, but I think there comes a time where we just need to be real with the Lord. Acknowledge the man's way of doing things is crap and we just need to cry out to Him. Why do we have to front on God? Why do we have to wear these masks before the Lord? Why can't we just come up to Him, with a level of venerability and brokenness and just say to the Lord. “I am heart broken and I need your help.”

I am posting some random posts!!

There are a few writings that I am going to post that are totally random. I hope you enjoy!!!

Sorry About the Last Pitty Party Post

Hey guys, Mom is going to get help. This is the first and most major step in her road to recovery. I know Jesus is the final answer, but now I can walk this journey out with my mother. Thank-you Jesus for breaking in. It's amazing how fast things can change. Will keep my 3 readers posted with details.

Till Next Time

Birdie

There is a Breaking Point

I am tired guys, trying to get my mom help and it's failing miserably. I wish I could cast those nasty demons out of her, but the doors are wide open. I feel like I am getting my butt kicked my the devil and I am finding it hard to find the quiet place I need. I am not happy right now, but I thought the Lord said I would have joy! I wish I could find it.

I am trying to get some down time and do it.

I think I have something locked up in me right now. I have been talking to myself lately working through some stuff. I promise something is about to be birthed and it just might be profound. I am hoping in the next few days I will be able to collect my thoughts in the midst of the whirlwind and write again. Thanks for waiting. Love You all.

Birdie

Hi,
I should be back in the next couple of days with a new post. I have something brewing inside of me. Pray for me. Pray for my mother. Till next time.

Shalom
Birdie

I Started Another Blog.....

Check out Free Thearpy!!!!

Jason Upton

Hey, I was wondering what is your favorite Jason Upton song or album? Hands down ,my favorite is Dying Star. What is yours? Dying Star has always spoke to my spirit, and brought a level of healing. I am listening to it again, and you hear little things that you didn't hear before. It's blowing me away. Thank-you lord for Jason Upton and this album!!! woo-hooo!!

Birdie

The Lord Just Told Me To Love Her

I see more and more beauty of our Lord. The Lord is making this journey easy for me. He is giving me crazy grace, and I thank-you for that Lord. There are moments of awkward pain, but I think due to my obedience of the Lord's leading; He is taking it away faster than usual. For some strange feeling, I feel like I am getting stronger in the midst of the chaos.

It feels like everyday I am grabbing a hold of more of His grace. Lord, can I dance with you, in the rivers of your grace and mercy? I like your grace Jesus! It's pretty awesome! Show me your grace and beauty, Lord Jesus. Lord, thank you for making this trip that much easier.

A few years back, I had a major reconciliation with my mother. I think that moment with my mother, had prepared my heart to follow the command of Jesus today. He told me just to love her. Don't judge her, don't hold bitter hostility towards her, Just love your mother. And that's all I can do, because the Lord told me to do it. Like I have said before, I am truly learning how to honor my mother.

It was the first part of the onion getting peeled off. I knew that it broke in on my mother's heart too, because I was no longer the “Religious Christian.” who was a hypocrite. I guess we never know that moment of forgiveness, what the implications of it will be in the future. That encounter has open the doors in my heart to bring a level of healing. I was thinking about that today, if that didn't happen, I would be like my sisters, angry at my mother for not being there for us all these years. And you weren't there for us why should we be here for you?

The reality is this, I realized that I could no longer be mad at my mother. How could she give me what she never received from her alcoholic parents? I had the revelation that my mom has a lot of pain that she has carried over her life. How could I add to it more? I want to see my mother free, I want her to have a restoration that she may think will never come in her life. I want my mom to know and love Jesus when it's all said and done. I want the good things for my mother. I also wanted to obey what the Lord has told me to do, now that she is back in my life.

What Would Make A Gas Noble?

I was reading in a Chemistry review that I have on my computer about Noble Gases. It stated the reason why these gases are noble because they are 'chemically content with their status as single atoms. Is there a hidden message from the Lord in there? Hey Lord are you trying to tell me something? Lord, what are YOU really saying? Oh You are so silly Lord! ( In my best Home star Runner impersonation.) I read the description and I almost fell off my seat. Is the Lord talking to me through the status of Noble Gases and their properties? Of Course He is. He's God. He's clever like that. just ask Balam and his ass. I just can't believe how funny the Lord is. His sense of humor is rocking my world. He will use all things for His glory.

Now that I think about it, all the atoms on the periodic table are trying to reach octet in their outer shell, that's why there is covalent bonds,Ionic bonds, here a bond there a bond everywhere a bond bond. They want the 8.

If you aren't stable you are radioactive. Then you are an isotope and who really wants to be an isotope? Who really wants to be radioactive? I have been toxic for way too long. Forget being a 10, I want to be an 8! 8 in your outer shell in chemistry is what makes you stable. I want 8 in my outer shell. The Lord designed everything to have balance in all things. What a clever God we have, still baffling scientist since the beginning of time.

As the Apostle Paul said I try to be content in all things. Even the atoms of the universe are trying to achieve being content, or that “cloak of nobility.” So the Lord created everything to have balance and contentment and I guess the end of it all peace.

I think this time around I am going to get a lot more out of studying Chemistry. Thanks Lord for the renewed enthusiasm for Chemistry and Math. I have the mind of Christ, and if the Lord designed this world. I declare and decree that I will be able to balance out chemical equations and that I am a straight A student. Haha!! Let it be so Lord! Doing a happy dance with the King of Kings!

To all the chemist who read this, I am still learning. If by some chance, I am technically off please correct me in love. You are the best.

Oh yeah, if you can name all the Noble gases, without looking at the Periodic Table, You win a hug from me!!! You guys are the best!

Till Next Time,
Shalom


Thanks to www.chemreview.net for the info.

Another Shameless Plug for IHOP

I am blown away from the AMAZING MUSIC coming out of IHOP. You need to go buy the single "My Beloved" by Cory Asbury. I hit the ground again, when I listened to it, I just remembered Marvin and the crew singing this chours. Brought back some happy memories. I will say this much. This song is forever my warfare song. :)

Peace

Just A Thought

Here is a thought, if you listen to a healing and deliverance conference from Morningstar you should expect something to leave you.

I think I manifested on my mother today and I felt like a jerk. I think I even scared her demons.

Recanting isn't that bad....(It' depends on what you are recanting from)

I am glad Luther didn't recant. Where would we be if he recanted?

I need to recant something I said in my first blog entry. Please disregard my first blog entry! I do care if people read my blog. End of Entry.

Jesus The Ultimate Freedom Rider

The Lord is so funny, I open up my email today, and the title of my Derek Prince devotional is, “The Way Out is Up.” That truly is the final answer. Lord, I need to see with a heavenly perspective. Lord, help me to keep my gaze locked on you, no matter what the situation is. Lord, I don't want to believe what I see, I want to believe in the invisible realm. That is my cry of my heart and that is my warfare, to stay in that place of gazing upon the Beautiful One.

For those who have been praying for my mother, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I love you all so much, words cannot explain how much I love you and how much it means to me. I have been dealing with some deep pain when it comes to the mother daughter relationship. The tears themselves have been hitting me in waves. One moment I think I am OK, the next I am crying these large tears that come from a deep place of pain and longing. I am actually shocked how deep this pain is, and I am shocked that I have carried it around for so long. Jesus knows the way to get to the pain and on the other side is FREEDOM!!! I think that there is a Happy Dance in there somewhere!

So here I am once again, clinging on His hem and waiting for the freedom to bust forth. What does freedom feel like in an area that you have been bound in for so long? I want to get addicted to freedom. Do what you have to do Lord, that I may be totally free in your Spirit. Do It Lord.! Lord, I feel hope again. Thank-you!

Last night while I was sprawled out on the dining room floor crying, a thought popped into my head. This situation is totally God's economy. I get delivered of my deep pain from not having a real relationship with my mother, and my mother gets saved. Wow, the Lord is killing two birds with one stone! Our God is so clever! I have to remember that it's not about me. It was never about me, nor will it ever be about me. It's about Him, and Him alone.

Can I trust the Lord to be the Great Deliverer? That is the question that I am asking and that's what it is coming down to. I mean you read the book of Exodus and the Lord delivered 4 million Jews out of Egypt. Do you think I could surrender to this Great Deliverer? Can I just trust Him and that all His ways are good. What is my issue? He is the LORD GOD ALMIGHTY! I have to surrender any expectations that I might have and the way I want to do it, and let God be God. And this wendybird needs to fly out of the way so God can finish what He started in me, and my mother.

I serve an awesome God. Jesus you are the gentle shepherd and I thank-you for your kindness and gentleness. No one can compare to you Jesus!! Lord, You are the Way, Truth, and Life! I would be so lost without you!!! Thank-you Lord for saving me!!! I love you Lord!!! Your ways are higher than my ways. Lord, help me to lean into your sovereignty. Lord, help me have the Hebrews 11 faith.

So, I pick up my mother from the airport tonight, and I don't know what to expect. I haven't seen her in 6 years. I am just going to love on her and serve her and I think that I am learning to truly honor my mother. Through the pain, through the good days , through the bad days, I am learning how to honor my mother. I know Jesus is pleased with that.

A few more things before I go, To all my spiritual mothers who loved me through out my journey in Christ, I love you all so much. You know who you are. Your reward is great in heaven.
The Lord pressed something upon my heart, and I heard Him say to me, “Mother to the Nations.” I broke down and cried again. Let it be so, Lord.

Till Next Time
Shalom

Jeremiah 13:11 (New American Standard Bible)

11'For as the waistband clings to the waist of a man, so I made the whole household of Israel and the whole household of Judah cling to Me,' declares the LORD, 'that they might be for Me a people, for renown, for praise and for glory; but they did not listen.'

Goto IHOP.ORG and buy Majestic

The best CD out of KC yet!!! The Entry is the Psalm 119 song that has been all over IHOP!!! AMAZING Songs!!! AMAZING Song writing!!!! AMAZING musicans. I can't stop playing this CD. It brings you right into the presence of the LORD!!! GO BUY IT!!! You won't be disapointed!!!

I Took A Thought Captive and I Liked It!

WOW!!! Breakthrough!!! I am doing the happy dance. I think I am starting to get it. Yesterday,I believe is the first step in learning how to “renew my mind in the truth of the Lord.”
I took that lie and it's no longer truth in my mind. Whooo-hooo!!! Yesterday I learned truly how to disarm the power of lies in my life. This is huge. One lie at a time, you are going down. You will have no more power over me. Oh Happy day !!!

I don't care if anybody reads this blog.

Out of Obedience to the Lord. I am starting this blog. I am not a great writer so please have mercy on me:) There is more to come!!!